Q1: Youâve just been offered a job coaching a team in a league you know nothing about. Your immediate reaction is: A. To bake a batch of biscuits and start learning everyoneâs middle name. [You are Ted Lasso] B. To buy the team, fire the pessimists, and look impeccable while doing it. [You are Roy Kent] C. To growl at the person offering the job until they leave, then secretly take it because you miss the pitch. [You are Roy Kent] D. To immediately brainstorm a three-phase branding pivot and a celebratory "launch" party. [You are Keeley Jones] Q2: A local in the pub makes a skeptical comment about your new career move. How do you respond? A. "Be curious, not judgmental." Then ask them if they want to join your trivia team. [You are Ted Lasso] B. A cold, elegant stare that makes them rethink their entire lineage. [You are Rebecca Welton] C. A string of four-letter words so creative it should technically be considered poetry. [You are Roy Kent] D. You don't respond; youâre too busy live-tweeting a photo of your better, much cooler shoes. [You are Keeley Jones] Q3: The theme of the season is "Leap Before You Look." What does that mean to you? A. It means trusting that wherever you land, itâs exactly where you were meant to be. [You are Ted Lasso] B. It means taking a massive financial risk because your gut tells you itâs the right thing for the culture. [You are Rebecca Welton] C. It means head-butting the problem and dealing with the concussion later. [You are Roy Kent] D. It means starting a new business venture before the business plan is even finished. [You are Keeley Jones] Q4: Youâre returning to a place where you have a lot of "history." Whatâs your first stop? A. The office of the person I might still be in love with, just to say "Hi." [You are Ted Lasso] B. The boardroom, to remind everyone who actually owns the building. [You are Rebecca Welton] C. The equipment room, to make sure the grass is the correct height. [You are Roy Kent] D. The local cafĂŠ, to catch up on the gossip and get a high-quality latte. [You are Keeley Jones] Q5: How do you handle a "second-division" challenge? A. I treat it like a first-division opportunity. The size of the stage doesn't change the heart of the performance. [You are Ted Lasso] B. I use my resources to elevate everyone around me until the "second division" feels like a world-class empire. [You are Rebecca Welton] C. I work them so hard they forget theyâre in the second divisionâor they quit. Either way, problem solved. [You are Roy Kent] D. I find the "spark" in the struggle and turn it into a viral success story. [You are Keeley Jones] Q6: Itâs the first day of training with the new squad. How do you set the tone? A. I spend the first hour memorizing everyone's hometown and asking about their favorite childhood snacks. [You are Ted Lasso] B. I deliver a composed, high-stakes speech from the touchline that makes everyone realize theyâre part of something historic. [You are Rebecca Welton] C. I don't say a word. I just blow the whistle until someone looks like theyâre about to pass out, then I nod once. [You are Roy Kent] D. I hand out personalized "Welcome" kits and spend the afternoon filming a "Day in the Life" video to build the hype. [You are Keeley Jones] Q7: Someone accidentally tears the "Believe" sign in the locker room. Your reaction is: A. I tell a story about a kite with a broken string that still found its way home, then I get the tape. [You are Ted Lasso] B. I immediately order a more durable, higher-quality version, but I keep the original because it has "character." [You are Rebecca Welton] C. I stare at the person who did it until they start apologizing in three different languages. [You are Roy Kent] D. I turn the tear into a "symbol of resilience" and start a social media campaign about "Healing the Heart of Richmond." [You are Keeley Jones] Results: - You are Ted Lasso: You represent the Full-Circle Journey. After leaving London to reconnect with your family, your return signifies that "home" isn't a place, but a group of people youâve helped grow. You aren't just coaching football; youâre coaching the human spirit. Youâre dealing with The Sophomore Slump of the Soul. The novelty has worn off, and now you have to prove that your brand of kindness can win championships in a league that doesn't care about your biscuits. - You are Rebecca Welton: You are the "Institutional Heart." Youâve moved past the "Boss" phase and into the "Icon" phase. For you, the Richmond Womenâs team is a legacy project, a way to ensure that the club belongs to the community long after the trophies are put away. Youâre navigating the boardroom and the locker room with equal grace, but the pressure to succeed in the second division is weighing on your "Starlight" composure. - You are Roy Kent: You are the Authentic Friction. You don't leap into things; you charge into them with your head down and your teeth bared. Your role in the new season is to be the reality check that the Lasso Way occasionally needs. You provide the grit that turns a nice team into a winning team. Youâve embraced the coaching role, but youâre struggling with the fact that the womenâs team might actually be tougher than the menâs team was. Itâs making you⌠Dare we say⌠proud? - You are Keeley Jones: You are the Cultural Catalyst. Youâre the reason people who don't even like football are wearing Richmond jerseys. You understand that in 2026, a team is a brand, a story, and a movement all rolled into one. You leap because youâre the only one who can see the landing strip through all the glitter. Youâre juggling KJPR with the massive task of making the womenâs team a global phenomenon. Youâre the bridge between the old-school football culture and the modern digital world.
